It’s serendipitous that my operation was when it was so that my recovery was during the last two months of a really crappy year. I’m one of those people that likes thinking of new years as new beginnings in a way, and this year is just so much more than that.
Because my recovery has been so smooth and well, perfect, I’ve been able to start 2018 feeling better than I can remember feeling in well over a decade. It’s so difficult to describe and the more I think about it the more my mind is blown by just how much of my physical and mental health was affected by just my uterus.
I know the hysterectomy didn’t get rid of my PCOS, but my consultant did say my ovaries were 100% cyst free (a massive change from the ultrasound I had in March) so he didn’t drill them like we had planned. It’s possible that being on such a high dose of hormones turned it around and it’s common for ovaries and hormones to reset after a hysterectomy so I’m not dealing with any of the PCOS stuff for now. It may well return in the future, of course!
I also don’t expect that it got rid of my depression, but I will admit that it’s like a massive black cloud has dissipated and I feel lighter, mentally. I do attribute some of that to my own attitude and knowing myself well enough to know what I can handle. Staying positive can be difficult, especially when your head is telling you nothing is worth it, and doesn’t work for everyone but for me it’s helped immensely. (I’m starting to sound like a cheesy motivational speaker!)
Without feeling so rubbish from hormone imbalances and a uterus full of cells that want to kill me in a plethora of ways I’m a completely different person. It makes me sad a little bit to think that this is who I could have been all these past years, but I won’t dwell on what could have been and will instead focus on what is now!
We started focusing on our health on Monday and I feel so good for it! We signed up for the Body Coach’s 90 Day Shift, Shape, Sustain plan and started it this week. I did it a few years ago and got some great results and it’s getting both of us back into what we should be doing – exercising and eating healthier! The fact that I haven’t eaten any off plan foods this week and done all the workouts as much as I could (still protecting my pelvic muscles a bit, but I’m doing more than I thought I could!) is pretty good going. Especially considering I have a lot of stuff left from the holidays I’d love to eat.
I also (finally) started yoga! I found Yoga with Adriene a few years ago and I really like her and her style. She does a 30 days of yoga every January and this year’s theme is ‘TRUE’ and it’s been really helpful, mentally and physically.
I am in the perfect head space right now to be focusing on myself in such positive ways and I’m honestly just so happy to be moving forward and taking care of myself and motivating hubby to join me on the journey!
I have a few really good things to look forward to coming up:
- We are off to Palma for a long weekend this month! I’m so excited!!
- We have a new nephew that we’ll get to see soon!
- I’m planning lots of catch ups with friends <3
- I’m chopping my hair tomorrow!! What’s the saying? A woman who changes her hair is about to change her life? I cut it a bit last month because I was still undecided… but now I’m going for it. It needs a bit of a refresh, just like me!
I hope you all have lovely things to look forward to. I’m here to tell you, if things are dark and you’re scared or hurting… it can get better and will be okay.